I'm a social worker. Half of the kids I work with are 11 year old boys who struggle with anger outbursts due to the trauma, sickness, and emotional pain they've had to experience in their lives. I am the one who works with the family and providers to develop a "crisis plan" so everyone knows what to do to be safe and calm when a potential crisis comes up. The one "trigger" on nearly every single little boy's list is "being told 'no'." I feel ya, kid.
Then, in a whirlwind of nothing we ever expected falling into place better than we ever imagined with more peace than we could even understand, God gave us another detour to follow.
When it’s come to big questions of the universe or small questions of my life, I’ve always just defaulted to trust that God has a plan and loves me and is in control. But very recently I’ve finally decided to face a personal struggle head on. Off and on in the past nearly four years of wrestling with the why, I’ve found myself tugged to view it as an injustice towards me. I start towards the whiny kid stage of “It’s just not fair!”
Ok, honestly, I love lazy days on the couch binge-watching Netflix and surrounded by the trash that once held my junk food just as much as the next guy. In fact, I did a lot of that this past weekend. But even then, encompassed by my lack of motivation, I feel super antsy I’m not doing something.